"I want to be my own design" Clive Barker - Imajica

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

It's a rant, with a touch of raving

I've had all these thoughts in my head that I wanted to write about but I have been struggling with organizing my thoughts and figuring out how and what I want to say. Brain dump ahead, just so you know.

*I've seen a lot of "pretty girl" behavior the last couple of weeks. Pushing people out of the way because of jealousy and insecurity. Doing everything short of screaming "PAY ATTENTION TO ME" when they weren't getting the attention they felt like they deserved. I felt like telling these girls (oh yes there has been more than one) "Honey you aren't that pretty" but I realized that I don't need to say or do anything. Their beauty will fade and they will be faced with the harsh reality that their looks were truly the only thing they had going for them because they never took the time to develop anything real. It's sad, pathetic and somewhat pitiable. Somewhat.

*I have never understood lying. It amazes me the level of effort people will go to just to keep the truth from coming out. Even when it is something trivial or asinine. I suppose lying is second nature to some people. I suppose it's like breathing to some people. I however barely have the energy to tie my shoes let alone make up elaborate stories and fictions about my life or your life or whatever the fuck people lie about. I've been sitting back and watching this happen for a long time but I've been especially aware of it these last couple of weeks. Lying takes too much effort. Just be honest people, it's a lot easier.

*I really hate being taken for granted. I am not being taken for granted right now FYI, but there is nothing I hate more than being treated like a piece of furniture or having people just assume I will do certain things without asking. And I really, really hate it when people don't say please or thank you. It is a courtesy thing.

*I am unreasonably grumpy today. Some people would blame it on the weather since it has been raining quite a bit over the last couple of weeks. I don't know, maybe that's part of it but it doesn't explain this raw nerve feeling. Like you brush me and I will fucking kill you. *shrug* I don't  know but I hope it goes away soon because it really annoys the hell out of me to be this short tempered.

I'm gonna watch Red Dwarf until I fall asleep.

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